WIW: Brush With Death

So, this is the face one makes in a photograph after some shaved-headed psychopath tries to force you off the side of the road, follows you for four blocks, and then gets out at a red light to bang on your car, demand that you open the window, and threaten you until traffic allows you to escape. Seriously, I thought he was going to walk up and shoot us both in the face. All I could think to do was take his picture with my cellphone, hoping that he wouldn't hurt us if we had his identity on camera.

Near as we can tell what set him off? He was trying to exit his driveway and could not see us coming because of parked cars. We were going max speed limit and had the right of way, but he went insane accusing us of driving recklessly and speeding. There was nothing even close to a collision! He was just. flippin'. crazy.

We did call the police afterward, but they said that they couldn't do anything unless the altercation was still in progress, and they told us it was pointless to file a report. I am still sending his pic and licence plate # to friends in case DH and I disappear (this happened close to our home, so we're slightly afraid he will find us one day) - Still, I am kicking myself for not calling 911 right when he first started trying to hit us with his car. If this ever happens to you, don't think, just call the cops ASAP!


This post is also published in the youlookfab forum. You can read and reply to it in either place. All replies will appear in both places.


  • April replied 6 years ago

    Oh my goodness, Rae -- how disturbing. I hate when police say there's no point in filing a report. Really? What if the same guy did the same thing to five other people and everyone was told not to bother?

  • Transcona Shannon replied 6 years ago

    OMG Rae!!! How terrifying! I had a road rage nut one time get out of his truck with a baseball bat and come at my car because he wanted to turn left and I was going straight so therefore did not turn with the turn light (it was not a turn lane BTW). I just hit the gas and my horn and went right through the red light. No way was I going to let him crang me with that bat.

    Are you sure there's no point filing a complaint, just in case he should cause you any trouble in the future?

  • pil replied 6 years ago

    I''m glad you weren't alone, it would have been even scarier. This is exactly why I tell my adult sons not to flip people off.

  • Arya replied 6 years ago

    Holy cow, how scary! I'm so glad that you're okay, but sorry that you're still scared.

    Incidentally, your outfit is awesome...I feel kinda weird saying it in light of your story, though.

  • MNsara replied 6 years ago

    Well, you look adorable in your BFs and crossbody!

    I'd still file something with the police. I agree that if his behaviour has happened before and continues, at some point he'll do damage to somebody or something. Who's to know if no one says anything!

    Long, long ago we once had a car follow us all over to run us off the road (in a light, slippery snow) all because my (not passive) husband kept his place in our lane of the freeway when this car wanted our lane. During the 15 minutes or so, I never even thought of getting the license number, so you're way ahead of the game :-) I did decide if there was every another scary incident, I'd drive directly to a police or fire station!

    Glad you're both okay.

  • texstyle replied 6 years ago

    Sorry to hear you got a close encounter with road rage Rae. Years ago when we lived in a very large city we had a similar incident happen. We were lucky, we knew where a small police substation was located and "led" him right to the front door. It was night so we were pretty scared. By the time he realized where we were he was trying to burn rubber to get outta there, but an officer was just getting in his car in front of us and we pointed to the truck and said "That guy's chasing us and has been trying to ram us with his truck for no reason!" The cop hightailed it off after him and we just headed home. Whew.

    You are right to call police asap. I think I might have run the red light to get away! Yikes.

    On the plus side, these things are often just moments of rage, and he'll probably regret it himself.

  • replied 6 years ago

    Oh, how scary! That happened to me once, where a guy followed me when I was on my bike because I had the nerve to take the lane because I was going to make a left turn. He crowded up behind me and kept revving the engine and yelling out the window at me, and I was so scared I pedalled faster than I had ever before and got the hell off to a path where he couldn't drive.

  • Jem replied 6 years ago

    Geez, I'm glad you are ok!! I'm glad he wasn't a crazy with a gun. You were smart to take his picture!

  • rae replied 6 years ago

    Jiminy Cricket, there is a lot of road rage out there! I'm so sorry to all of you who had similar experiences - SO not fun. OY, a baseball bat! I was going to say I can't imagine, but unfortunately now I can! We could not even run the red light like Shannon, because it there was traffic all around... sounds like it shouldn't have been scary with so many people around, but in LA it's kinda like you know no one will stop to help.

    Ceit, that is scary, too! I am one of the first to admit I get frustrated with bikes who do not follow the rules, or who are not mindful of traffic, or who block entries to the gas station... anyway, yeah, it can be hard to be behind a bike in the city. But taking it out on the good bike riders is just as bad!

    Right now I'm just happy to be home, sipping on my second amaretto sour since noon (it's 12:04 now). 0_o

  • catgirl replied 6 years ago

    OMG, how horrible for you, Rae. Glad someone else was with you when it happened - imagine if you'd been alone?!?! So thankful you are okay! And who knows what kind of wingnut will pull out a gun for no reason?

    I've read that a lot of these incidents involve veterans with PTSD who have rage triggered by untreated psychological issues related to returning to civilian life. Not an excuse by any means - just a sad commentary on the world in general.

  • cciele replied 6 years ago

    Oh no Rae! That sounds horrible. I can't believe how angry people get in the car. Glad you are safe and hope you remain so!

  • jayne replied 6 years ago

    my heart is pounding just reading about it...you poor thing. Deep breaths, long walk on beach, be thankful you have a better outlook than that poor miserable...xxx

  • Scarlet replied 6 years ago

    Wow, and I thought the drivers/bicyclers I saw today were nuts! (Not a crack at cyclists, just the ones who run red lights and are too high to notice.) Glad you are okay.

  • Angie replied 6 years ago


    I'd have needed SEVERAL days of serious tea drinking to calm me down after that one, Rae. You rest up with that amaretto sour and snuggle with the cats. Let hubs give you a little extra TLC tonight.

    Love your outfit, btw.

  • Inge replied 6 years ago

    What is wrong with people!!?!!
    What a scary and creepy experience, Rae-((( I'm so glad you are both OK. Do take enough time to process this, enjoy those amarettos and let it soon all be in the past.

  • celia replied 6 years ago

    OMG, that guy is crazy.Take as much time as you need to calm down after that horrible experience.

  • JulieJohn replied 6 years ago

    Rae, this wasn't on Melrose was it? Hubs and I had a crazy guy follow us for blocks yelling and giving the bird there. Not fun, but yours sounds much worse!!! I'm so sorry you had that unfortunate brush with humanity's seamy side. You deserve greatness, not this!

    Regarding your photo, your facial expression was so sad and cute. I love your outfit, that's just the kind of thing I wear to all my encounters with nut-jobs.

  • Diana replied 6 years ago

    Yeeesh. Scary. I would still be shaking. Glad that you are both OK though.

    On a lighter note, your outfit looks great.

  • biscuitsmom replied 6 years ago

    OMG! TG you both are ok! People are f'ing nuts :( My DH has a quick temper when driving and am always afraid he'll run into a psycho like yours.... think its ridiculous the cops didnt want you to file a report when you got the nutbag's license # :( Be careful, girl....

  • rae replied 6 years ago

    Yeah, I was pretty aghast at the cop's attitude, too. Guess this is super small potatoes to those poor guys who must see truly horrible things, but I'd like to keep from becoming a truly horrible thing, thankyouverymuch. :T

    JulieJohn, it was not on Melrose, though I wish it was! That is far enough away from home to avoid the area, at least...

    Thank you for all the positive vibes. DH and I took a little nap, too. Oy, what a world!

  • Mona replied 6 years ago

    Rae, this is so frustrating. I am glad that you and hubby are okay. Things could have been worse. You and I were BF twins today.

  • Zapotee replied 6 years ago

    Holy cow Rae. That's my biggest fear materialized, especially because I live I looney tune town. I am so glad it was just a big, horrid scare.
    I learned the hard way too that police sometimes have their hands tied. We actually had an incident in a club once, some psycho hitting on a friend and yes, the police could not do anything because we had left the place and were standing outside when we called.

    You look pretty awesome scared face and all. I am loving your casual looks.

  • replied 6 years ago

    Well you look pretty darn good all things considered. I'm impressed that you A) took a WIW picture after the fact and B) waited until noon to start hitting the sauce. I'm afraid I would have needed a medicinal morning bloody mary!

  • JR replied 6 years ago

    Oy vay! Glad you came out of it okay. Taking a picture of him was a really good idea.

  • replied 6 years ago

    Rae, that is so upsetting, I hate that you went through that! Big hugs. Time for another drink and a Hank snuggle!

  • christy replied 6 years ago

    Yikes! That is so scary. So glad it didn't turn into something super serious. I had a crazy run-in with some guys who followed me off the freeway and tried to pull in front of me to force me to stop. Luckily I was able to drive around them, but man, my heart was racing when they got out of the car and started walking towards me.

    Sheesh! What is wrong with people?! Hope the shaking has subsided a bit.

  • shevia replied 6 years ago

    I would still be shaking. You look marvelous but what a horrible experience and so scary with all the crazy things that happen. And so sad the police say it is pointless to pursue. Glad you are ok though.

  • Aida replied 6 years ago

    Yikes, how scary! I'm so glad you and your husband are both fine, too bad it happened close to home :( Also, what Claire said! Love the outfit though, I have to say you always look fab in your BF outfits!

  • KathyL replied 6 years ago

    How scary for you and your DH. I hope you are feeling better, and you look great despite it all :)

  • Debbie replied 6 years ago

    This is really scary. I am glad you are OK.

  • Brain of Jen replied 6 years ago

    Wow, that's scary! Glad you're ok! I probably would've froze, it was smart thinking to take his picture.

  • goldenpig replied 6 years ago

    OMG how scary! I can't believe how crazy people are. Wow, you even had the presence of mind to take his pic and get his license plate? I would file a report anyways! So so glad you two are OK. You look fab as usual, BTW.

  • Kirti replied 6 years ago

    God that is scary! glad you are okay!!!

  • morethanbeige replied 6 years ago

    Oh Rae, so sorry this happened! So glad that you both are OK.

  • Suz replied 6 years ago

    Whoa. Rae, that sounds seriously horrible!! I am so glad you and hubs are all right. What a nightmare. I am with Angie. It would take me a lot of cups of tea to settle after that...

  • rae replied 6 years ago

    Thank you all, it is very comforting to have all this positive energy around. There was definitely a bad moon out yesterday, because I got a call at 7pm that my sister was rear ended on the freeway! She is mostly fine (thank heaven and knock on wood), but needed muscle relaxers. Her car is totally destroyed, though. And then a friend almost got hit by a speeding car running a red light... What a bad day to be on the road!

  • Mochi replied 6 years ago

    Oh, rae. I usually refrain from cursing on YLF, but shit. That's effed up. I'm so glad you're physically okay, but that's really scary. Try and do whatever you need to to feel better, even if it's buying something normally out of budget. Sending calming thoughts your way.

  • Vicki replied 6 years ago

    You poor baby! At first, I thought I was going to see the photo of Mr. Angry Needs Anger Management Classes here!

    How frightening and hopefully this was a random act and he will disappear or, better yet, learn to control his temper and see why his buttons are pushed so quickly. I'm just glad you were driving defensively. We need you here and happy with a smiling face! ^_^

  • Isabel replied 6 years ago

    He was baging on your car ? That is property destruction/vandalization.

    Rae, it doesn't matter if the police do nothing with the report, what matters is that you document it. Go the police station and fill out a report and attach his picture. If the police say it is pointless, you tell them that you want it documented. This guy sounds as if he is incensed with what he view as speeders down his road. He is going to hurt someone. It needs to be documented somewhere that this is going on. I'll bet there are others. This could be an example of some loose wire that no one does anything about until he goes nuts and hurts someone.

    Also, NEVER wait for a light to change if you are in a dangerous situation. Make sure it is safe, then BLOW THE LIGHT !!!!!!!!!!!

  • replied 6 years ago

    OMG! Hopefully this was a random act that will never happen again.

    That same thing once happened to my mom. Since she was downtown near the police station, she chose to drive to the police station. When the guy who was trying to get into her car (he was on a bicycle, banging on her window and trying to open her car door) realized where she was going, he let go and disappeared.

    Nowadays with cell phones so readily accessible, if this happened to me and I was not in the car alone, I would have the passenger take a pic of the perpetrator.

  • Aziraphale replied 6 years ago

    Wow. I haven't been around much this week so I missed this thread, but....holy shit. I'm glad you're OK, Rae! How frightening.

  • harmonica replied 6 years ago

    Frightening and scary! Very glad you and DH are ok. Take care, rest up and know with yourself you did the right thing by taking pic and calling the police. Frustrating about the police, but you did your best anyway.

  • ElleH replied 6 years ago

    Wow! I'm glad you're ok.

  • Janet replied 6 years ago

    Just seeing this so I'm a little late, but ITA with Isabel. Glad you're ok!

    I had something similar happen many years ago when I was in my early 20s and still living at my mom's house. A guy cut me off with barely an inch to spare -- almost hit my car -- and my immature shocked reaction was to not only hit the brakes and the horn but also flip him the bird (I stopped doing that after this incident). Well, he slammed on his brakes, blocking me in my lane, and got out of the car and started coming towards me, yelling. I managed to get around his car to get out of there, but he jumped back in the car and started following me. I was so rattled I just wanted to get home (I was only about 3 miles from home), and I thought he'd give up and turn off, but as I got closer to home, I realized he wasn't giving up. Rather than go home and let him see where I lived, I just started driving around in circles, and eventually he turned off and left me alone. Of course this was long before cell phones. So scary!

  • ElleH replied 6 years ago

    Janet, or anyone interested, if that happens drive to a police station, if you know where one is.

  • rachylou replied 6 years ago

    Wow. Scary.

    And Gad. No law on the ground.

  • Jonesy replied 6 years ago

    OMG, Rae, what an awful thing to experience! And your sister and friend too, all in the same day! Nutso. These other stories are really scary too. I hope you have managed to put it behind you today. I would probably feel sort of edgy for a few days!

  • Debora replied 6 years ago

    Oh my gosh, I'm so glad you are ok, Rae! What a terrible thing to happen. It's really eye-opening to hear everyone's stories. It's a crazy world out there.

  • velvetychocolate replied 6 years ago

    I didn't see this when it was first posted, but after Julie asked how you were doing, I went looking through the threads to find out what happened.

    YIKES Rae....geesh.

    I'd be all freaked out.

    Are you ok? I mean, this must have been really scary and nerve-wracking, and I'm just wondering if you're ok now? I don't know about you, but in my own experience, I tend to 'feel' the effects *after* something has happened. If this is the case for you too - sending lots and lots of good thoughts so that you feel safe and secure again.

    And while I know it seems silly, the best thing you can do is get back into the car and drive all over the place again - the general idea is to replace the memory of this scary experience with all-new, "ok" and perfectly safe experiences in the car. Does that make sense? It's important, even if it seems silly. Go driving around ASAP and replace the memory of this recent, very negative experience with new and better experiences, so that this incident doesn't stand a chance of looming over you too much.

    In the meantime, I'm sending (virtually) my big black lab, "Gus" and all of his friends to hang out on your front step, porch or doorway to make sure nobody makes you feel scared. Gus and his friends promise not to bother your kitty cat, but they *will* make sure that no one comes to bother you.

    Hang in there, and here's hoping you're getting a good night's sleep after this drama, and that you feel a million times better by tomorrow morning.

  • MsMary replied 6 years ago

    Yikes, Rae!! I'm so sorry this happened to you!! Big hugs!!!

  • Marley replied 6 years ago

    That is soooo scary! I'm so sorry that you had to go through that Rae!

  • rae replied 6 years ago

    Mental hugs to everyone for their continued thoughts. We are indeed trying to put it all behind. Since neither we nor our car was damaged, we are focusing on my sister right now, who is without a vehicle for the moment and taking muscle relaxers.

    VC, thank you for the advice about driving around more. I actually had to go out to a mixer that evening by myself, and it wasn't as bad as I thought.

    BUT, you can bet that I now know where the local police station is!

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